Tag Archives: introversion

Things That Help Me Have A Better Day

There are some things that, no matter what else is going on in my life, when I do them, I seem to have a better day.

(Kittens Don't Need Lists)

Here are a few of the things on my list:

  1. Meditating for 15 minutes
  2. Exercising – doing something that gets my heart rate up for at least 10 (ideally 20) minutes
  3. Writing a blog post
  4. Decluttering an area of my house
  5. Spending time outside
  6. Connecting with my friend Sarah
No matter what else is going on in my life, I almost always feel better when I do any or all of these things. (And there are more that I can’t think of right now.)

Having them on this list helps remind me to do them, because they’re not necessarily things I “feel like” doing in the moment.  I don’t wake up in the morning gagging to go for a run or sort out the hall cupboard; when the phone rings, my automatic (introvert) reaction is to recoil, even when I see my best friend’s name come up on the display; and in the depths of winter (or autumn, or early spring…oh ok anytime the sun’s not shining) I really do have to generate myself to leave the comfort of home!   I can even find myself putting off meditating, which I LOVE!  Come to think of it, however much I may procrastinate about doing any of the things on my list, something they all have in common is that I almost always enjoy actually doing them (yes, even sorting out the hall cupboard.  Weird, I know).

I’ve done this exercise (which I learned from Michael Neill; I think he writes about it in his great book You Can Have What You Want) with coaching clients and I’ve noticed that everyone’s list is different.  Lists might include going for a walk in the woods, taking 30  minutes to read over a cappuccino in Starbucks, writing in a journal, meeting up with a group of friends, doing an exercise class, or taking special time out to play with a child or cuddle up with a pet.

What’s on your list?

Flaine Breakfast

Alpine Breakfast

Flaine Breakfast

Sipping Darjeeling tea with my toast and marmalade, I am looking out over a sunny, snow-covered mountainside. We are on holiday in Flaine, in the French Alps. The children have happily joined friends at the hotel’s kids club, from where they will soon leave for their skiing lessons; DH has taken his snowboard to catch a few early morning runs (Nirvana in his headphones, sunglasses on); and I am left to savour this moment of serenity. Even the waitress has been a cooperative component in the perfection – shortly after I sat down at my window table she closed off this section of the restaurant, leaving me alone with my ipad, the view, and an assurance that I was free to stay here as long as I wanted.
And now I’m going to put on my skis and head off to the slopes. What better start to an introvert’s day? 🙂

An Introvert’s Survival Kit

A few months ago it dawned on me that I am not the extrovert I had always imagined myself to be, but rather one of the minority (quarter) of the population who are introverts. Shortly after this long-awaited epiphany, I came across a wonderful  book, The Introvert Advantage: How To Thrive In An Extrovert World by Marti Olsen Laney.  As I read it I was able to let go of years of making myself wrong for doing things that I now realise are just down to how my brain is wired: for example, I’m not anti-social for wanting loved visitors to leave after a few hours (I just find socialising more taxing than extroverts, and need time alone to recharge); I’m not lazy for wanting to sit down while talking (this also comes down to the energy being with other people requires); and I’m not a wuss for not being able to go out two nights in a row.  I just have a non-average brain which runs on a different set of neurotransmitters from extroverts.  (This also explains why, although I exercise regularly, I’ve never managed to get addicted to exercise in the way extroverted friends seem to be able to (introvert brains don’t get nearly the same neuro-chemical buzz from it as extroverts).)

Laney’s book explains that introverts are more sensitive to our surroundings and to anything that’s unpleasant or discomforting than extroverts are, which can be compounded by the fact that because we are metabolizing our food at a higher rate than extroverts, our blood sugar can easily plummet.  She suggests introverts keep to hand a survival kit, containing items such as:

1 Earplugs to block street noise.

2 Snacks to boost blood sugar when you feel it plummet.

3 Water.

4 Personal music player with soothing music.

5 A note card with an affirmation card like “Today I will relax and enjoy what comes.”

6 A soothing scent on a cotton ball to sniff if unpleasant odours bother you.

7 Medication for motion sickness.

8 An umbrella or parasol, if the sun bothers you.

9 Sunscreen, handcream and lip balm.  (Many introverts have sensitive skin.)

10 A battery fan or small spray bottle.

11 Hats with big brims and sunglasses.

12 A sweater or blanket.

13 Pocket handwarmers.

14 Earmuffs or a headband, if the wind hurts your ears.

When I showed the list to my husband he laughed out loud and said “that’s your handbag!” It’s nice to be understood.

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